Archive for June, 2011

Do You Love Me?

Posted by on June 19, 2011  |  No Comments

Think of someone you have the purest form of love for. Your son, your daughter, your spouse, your mother or your father, your best friend?   When that person is in danger or is in pain there is almost nothing you would consider doing to protect them or do for them that just comes natural. You love them. They are precious in your heart. They are of maximum value. You want absolutely no harm of any kind to come to them.

I know this man who loves me. One time He defended His love for me because He was making claims for me that many did not believe and then jeered Him and made fun of Him. Then because He would not recant on the claims He made, He was whipped until He bled. Eventually these people who refused to believe or understand, took Him and told Him they were going to hang Him on a cross and then made Him drag it to the hilltop where they planned to carry out this outrageous deed.

They took a horrible, sharp, thorny plant and shaped a circle from it , put it on His head and pounded it in to His skull until He bled. All the while He continued to defend His claim to be my Savior. He offered His love to any who would accept it. This was His crime.

But the angry mob continued and followed my friend to the top of a hill where they stripped Him of all His clothes, held Him to down on this cross and plunged and pounded spikes through His hands and feet. They gouged His side and He continued to bleed and hang in great physical pain.

But what eventually killed Him was the weight of those He was loving who would not accept Him. Their rejection and the sin that Lucifer introduced that would have a last effect on many, literally broke His heart and killed Him.

Why am I telling you this? When someone loves you with pure and unconditional love, it should be very difficult not to enter into a relationship with that person. The emphasis here is “pure.” No love is more pure than the love that comes from Jesus Christ.

As I review the many high profile programs that have dealt with “gay love” this year, my heart is heavy in observing the strong negative reactions from those who are chastising people for wanting to develop a relationship with their Heavenly Father.  In every instance of objection to this selfless love, are those who are dead sure that their self indulgences deserve societies stamp of approval. In fact their is little or no regard for their Heavenly Father.

They are willing to push this crown of thorns deeper into His skull in the midst of their insistence that their way is the right way.  Even when He continues  to call out to them with the offer of eternal and unconditional love while they continue to jeer and reject Him.

Perhaps His claims seem unbelievable. How is it that these self indulgent subjects cannot see and refuse to believe the claims of this man?  Is it not clear that someone or something is seeking to deceive and destroy the purest form of love?

When we are aware of such unconditional love, we want to get to know this Savior. We are affected by this kind of love. When we stop resisting and invite Him in and His Holy Spirit, change begins to take place. Sex and sexual identities become of less significance and a righteous purpose begins to take over.

As I have come to know my friend, I have come to believe and realize that He is the heart of my existence. I am studying and talking to Him more and more. He is continuing to enlighten me and strengthen me so that whatever challenge might be placed in my pathway; He will overcome through me.

But if I don’t engage in a relationship with Him, if I don’t communicate, if I don’t seek to know Him more completely; I also could be set up to be deceived by my own self indulgences and self importance. Risking every promise my Savior makes to me.

Jesus Christ paid for my eternal life with Him. He wants me more than anything to spend eternity with Him. But He wants to be sure I am serious in my decision. He allows me to be tested. He presents me with choice. He cannot risk another who in Heaven would one day say… “I think my way is a better way.”

Self is the enemy. Working more fervently than ever, as his time and his end draws closer, is the one who was allowed to present this challenge and deception before mankind. Satan works through a smorgasboard of feelings to bring to mind the slightest doubt that He hopes will grow and disarm us and place our focus on what he can deceptively make our reality.

And no wonder! For Satan himself transforms himself into an angel of light. Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also transform themselves into ministers of righteousness, whose end will be according to their works.”

2 Corinthians 11: 14-15

“Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.  And he that searcheth the hearts knoweth what is the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according to the will of God.  And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.”  Romans 8: 26-28

Advosaries today continually proclaim that “love” is all we need.  Indeed, love is the key ingredient to any long lasting relationship.  With that love, there is commitment. With love there is desire. As we become more familiar with our maker and develop a love relationship with Him, the natural result will be to seek to do His will instead of continuing to feed self will.

Choose Ye this day whom Ye will serve…. and let it be the Lord.

Filed Under: Wayne's Blog


Posted by on June 4, 2011  |  No Comments

“God may not want to use you this way.”

“You need to tell more about God’s love, than about what you believe to be truth! Truth is open for interpretation for all.”

“You’re being too hard on him.”  (A reference made by an observer after my advice to engage in a more personal relationship with Jesus. Rather than adopting the comment the person made to me; ‘God’s just going to have to understand, I need a little self-gratification.'”

Waiting …. after God seemingly opened doors, but there doesn’t seem to be any follow up.

Continued trust!


Being imperfect and having people try to shape you into what they believe God wants you to be.

Listening… but not hearing God speak to me “audibly” and trying to gauge whether the impulses are coming from God or from self.



Communion with God and meditation




Passion being misunderstood for something other than being Christ centered and the advancement of His love, truth and forgiveness.

Being the answer to so many prayers, but not recognizing change in relationships. Almost thinking that there was more continuity in relationships when I lived an open gay lifestyle.

Not knowing

Driven by what seems to be clear answers and solutions revealed to me through Christ

Continuous prayer and turning it over to Christ.

Feelings……………….  Still trying to fog the truth that Jesus makes clear to us over and over again.

Choice ……………… Believe the truth of Jesus or be misled by feelings and the tempter.




Forgiving Self

Abiding in Christ

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Galatians 6:9

Today, probably more than at any other time, we as people are challenged by a huge array of overwhelming temptations. By sight, by feelings, in thought…  It is my opinion that now, more than ever before, as Christians we must make our alliance with God. We are either for Him or against Him. We must choose.

Much in the way of stumbling blocks will be thrown in our pathway to test our relationship with our Redeemer. Will we cave in ? Well we falter? Will we give up? Will we let feelings take over and redirect our attentions to the things or people that bring self gratification and self indulgence?  Do we understand the “Great Controversy” taking place over our lives? Do we take our lives seriously or are we just passing through and not contemplating the meaning of life and our true responsibility?

For the last two years my life has been dedicated to doing God’s will instead of my own. Am I perfect now? By no means. Self continues to try to get in the way. But I recognize that and keep asking God to take control even when I don’t understand what He is doing and why.

I have so much to learn. I continue to study and trust that God is directing my attentions to where He wants them. I must continually SURRENDER my whole body and mind to Him in order or Him to complete the work that He started in me. It is for my salvation. My gaze and my focus must be completely and totally on Him in order for His purpose in me to be accomplished.  It’s not about how many people I can reach or how many minds I can change. That is not my job.

I choose to believe that God has preserved my life and by that example show to others how patient and loving our God is. To show that there is Hope for every soul who will listen and respond to His call to their heart.

Jesus is calling you home. Not to your earthly home.  He is calling you to a home that will be yours forever and ever. No hurt or pain. No judgments to be made. But communing with Him and His believers for eternity.

Contemplating a home without the presence of sin washes the soul with purpose and dedication.

Jesus is tenderly calling… Come home… come home

Filed Under: Wayne's Blog